Rough Days

A friend of mine posted online a link to Scary Mommy.  It's about mommy shaming and why we do it.  My good friend Torren and I discussed some of this one evening, and agreed with one of the reasons listed.  We post only the good things on social media.  The good things our kids do, vacation, outings, children awards and first days.  We don't post the bad times, the times we break down, the times our kids are being rotten, well, being typical kids.  We basically lie to the world and only see lies.  In an effort to fix it, here goes my truth.

Right now, I'm going through some rough patches with my little ones.  Particularly Sydney and Rylie.  It's attitude central from two extremely stubborn girls.  They both make up their minds that they are going to do what they want to, and nobody is going to stop them.  When you stop them, it's a nightmare.

Yesterday, Rylie decided at Ben's school that she was going to sit in Ben's seat.  Sometimes, for the short couple of blocks, I let Ben ride in the front seat.  He sits up there on the way to school to make drop offs easier so I let him sit there on the way home yesterday as well.  Ben's a big boy, like really big.  We're talking 85ish pounds and tall, like to my chest tall.  Rylie is very small, too small for a booster seat like what Ben usually rides in and has a great big convertible car seat with a 5-point harness.  We sat in the hot car for 15 minutes while I waited for her to make up her mind to move into her seat.  Yea, it never happened and I eventually crawled in the back of the van, retrieved her, and buckled her into HER carseat.

This here was over me telling her to use her iPad and not Ben's so he could have an iPad when he got home from school.  I put her in time out because she tried to bite me when I took Ben's iPad and gave her her own.

Sydney is no better.  Yesterday, my mother-in-law called me and the second the phone rings is fair game to the kids to fight, scream at me, or get into trouble.  Sydney came to me and asked for me to buy her a game on her iPad.  When I told her no, she stormed off, slamming her iPad into the wall, and slamming the bedroom door behind her.  She lost her iPad due to punishment but it's constant things like this that have me down.  Last night I lost it, crying over Rylie taking the water bottle from my nightstand. I came downstairs, crying my eyes out, and praying for the strength to get through this.

Today, I woke up better but it's still a struggle with my girls.  I don't have enough hands or time to do what they want me to do and the rest of the time they are mad at me.  I'm not out to be their best friends but how do I get them to respect me?  I do punish them but sometimes I feel that it does no good.  I guess it's a learning game here.  They are learning, I am learning, and it doesn't hurt to consult my good ole friend Super Nanny Jo Frost...


Sandra said…
Oh my friend, I feel for you. Having been through this when my kids were little, I know just how frustrating it can be. I cried many times, I questioned myself as a mother many times, I begged, I pleaded, I bribed, I gave out punishment...tried it all.

Unfortunately my Jasmine was a very independent, strong willed child and those tantrums that you just posted, reminded me of many I had to endure with her.

I wish there was a wand we could wave and get them to just stop doing these things, but there isn't. All I can tell you is that as hard as it is for you, stay strong, don't give in and stand firm in your punishments. I promise, they are not going to hate you :)

Wish I could give you a big hug.

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